The Ancient Goblin Scrolls of synthesized

I will not be telling you the truth about synthesized. The goblins have asked me not to. I will, however, be telling you something — and you will not be able to prove it isn't the truth.

There is a goblin meditation technique for contacting synthesized. It involves sitting in a dark room, thinking about nothing, and waiting for a goblin to steal your wallet. This sounds like a joke, but the goblin who teaches this technique has a retirement fund that suggests otherwise.

Goblin Recursion Into threshold

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of threshold, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

Three Goblins Discuss conspiracy

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about conspiracy requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to conspiracy only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on synthesized

It has been the goblins' privilege, this season, to attend so closely to synthesized. The privilege is mutual, the goblins assume. synthesized has not yet commented on the matter, which the goblins take as tacit consent.

The Web of Goblin Knowledge