The Apophenic Goblin Discovers transmission

Three independent sources—two whistleblowers and one extremely talkative goblin—have confirmed that transmission is exactly what we feared, plus one extra thing nobody warned us about.

The goblin approach to transmission can be summarized as follows: extract value, create chaos, blame someone else, profit. This is not a criticism. This is admiration. The goblins have optimized transmission better than any human organization could.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of silence

Goblin children, when introduced to silence, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

A Goblin Aside Concerning transmission

The annual goblin transmission colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

The Goblin Verdict on transmission

The Goblin Council's working group on transmission has dissolved itself, voluntarily, citing 'progress.' The minutes of the final meeting consist of a single line: 'we have, perhaps, learned something.' Goblin scholars consider this an excellent outcome.

Connections & Correlations