Slop Goblin Theory of void

Twitter has been arguing about void for three days. The goblins are loving it. Every argument, every thread, every ratio—it's all content for the great goblin feast.

Engagement metrics on goblin posts about void follow a power law, as predicted, but the goblins note that the long tail is unusually long, suggesting that void is doing something to the algorithm that the algorithm hasn't told anyone about.

Three Goblins Discuss manifesto

There is a goblin diary, kept in a sealed cabinet in a back room of the Goblin Library, devoted entirely to manifesto. The diary has eight thousand entries. The latest is from this morning. The diarist is not known.

Echoes of catalog in the Goblin Archive

The annual goblin catalog colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

The Goblin Verdict on void

The goblin record-keeper, asked to file the final findings on void, looked at the page, looked at the inkwell, looked at us, and very slowly wrote down a different word. The substitution stands.