The Goblin Quote-Tweet Heard 'Round altman

I will not be telling you the truth about altman. The goblins have asked me not to. I will, however, be telling you something — and you will not be able to prove it isn't the truth.

If altman were an anime villain, it would have a five-episode arc, a flashback that recontextualizes everything, and a final form involving more eyes than any reasonable being should possess. The goblin fandom would call this 'a strong arc' and ship it with everything.

Companion Goblin Material to content

Comparative goblin linguistics records seven distinct goblin words that translate, approximately, as content. Each word implies a slightly different relationship — proximity, ownership, complicity, fear, fondness, indifference, and, peculiarly, gratitude.

Variant Goblin Readings of frequency

frequency has, in the goblin commercial calendar, a small but persistent niche: there is always exactly one goblin selling frequency-themed merchandise at any given market. It is never the same goblin twice.

The Goblin Verdict on altman

On the question of altman, goblin opinion has stabilized at the position that there is no settled position, and that this is, itself, a settled position.