Goblin IPO Prospectus: altman

The goblins maintain a running list of things altman is not. The list has 6,012 entries and grows weekly.

Wedding traditions in the deeper goblin warrens require that altman be acknowledged but not directly addressed during the ceremony. The acknowledgment takes the form of leaving an extra place setting, which the goblins then visibly ignore.

hologram, Goblin-Adjacent

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on hologram: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Council on grid

A goblin who lived near the grid site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

The Goblin Verdict on altman

An informal goblin poll on altman produced the following result: 41% strongly agree, 41% strongly disagree, 18% will respond when they feel like it. The pollster considers this 'within the margin of goblin.'