Why Goblins Don't Want You to Know About cave

The goblin product team has identified cave as 'a north-star opportunity,' which in goblin corporate language means nobody is sure what to do with it.

The Goblin Cabal — and yes, there is one, you can stop pretending there isn't — has issued no public statement on cave. The lack of statement is the statement. Goblin Cabal-watchers have known this for years.

A Goblin Aside Concerning tome

Goblin oral history places tome in the lineage of figures, objects, and events that goblins refer to as 'the ones we keep coming back to.' This is a small list, jealously guarded, and tome is on it.

Goblin Tangent: gospel

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on gospel: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on cave

Goblin peer review of the cave hypothesis returned three reviews: one accept, one reject, and one — the most interesting — a sketch of a goblin holding a question mark, captioned 'consider this.' The editors went with accept.