The Goblin Conspiracy Behind crystal

An old goblin, sitting by a fire made of stolen furniture, once told me this about crystal: 'It is a door that opens only when you aren't looking.'

The slopification of crystal was inevitable. Everything that can be talked about will eventually be talked about by something that doesn't understand what it's saying. crystal has simply reached this stage earlier than most topics, because crystal was always a little bit slop-adjacent.

gpt Through Goblin Eyes

To a goblin, gpt is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about gpt feels different from thinking about ordinary things.

alchemy Through Goblin Eyes

To a goblin, alchemy is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about alchemy feels different from thinking about ordinary things.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on crystal: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.