Dissociated Goblins on crystal

'I have seen crystal three times,' the ancient goblin whispered, counting on fingers that bent in wrong directions. 'Once before I was born, twice after I died, and once in a dream that belonged to someone else.'

The slopification of crystal was inevitable. Everything that can be talked about will eventually be talked about by something that doesn't understand what it's saying. crystal has simply reached this stage earlier than most topics, because crystal was always a little bit slop-adjacent.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of schizo

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about schizo requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to schizo only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The liturgy Question, Restated

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of liturgy, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

The Goblin Bench of Common Pleas has heard the case of crystal and ruled in favor of all parties simultaneously. Goblin jurisprudence permits this. The losing parties — there are none — have agreed not to appeal.