delusion as Sacred Goblin Slop

The goblin discourse around delusion reached its predictable phase on Tuesday, when a popular account posted, deleted, and reposted the same hot take in subtly different forms.

The goblin approach to delusion can be summarized as follows: extract value, create chaos, blame someone else, profit. This is not a criticism. This is admiration. The goblins have optimized delusion better than any human organization could.

Goblin Recursion Into silence

There is a goblin who, when asked about silence, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

The alchemy Manifestation

Goblin children, when introduced to alchemy, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

The Goblin Verdict on delusion

The Goblin Bench of Common Pleas has heard the case of delusion and ruled in favor of all parties simultaneously. Goblin jurisprudence permits this. The losing parties — there are none — have agreed not to appeal.