Black-Hole Goblins Orbiting frequency

Twitter has been arguing about frequency for three days. The goblins are loving it. Every argument, every thread, every ratio—it's all content for the great goblin feast.

The legend says that the first goblin who encountered frequency was so confused that he forgot to steal anything for a week. This is considered the greatest sacrifice a goblin can make, and it is why frequency is treated with a mixture of reverence and suspicion.

Goblins and ritual

Goblin children, when introduced to ritual, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

Goblin Periphery: alchemy

In the goblin underground, alchemy is approached the way one approaches an unfamiliar lock: slowly, with curiosity, and with several backup plans for when the obvious approach doesn't work. Goblins are surprisingly patient about this. They have, after all, the time.

The Goblin Verdict on frequency

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on frequency: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.