What the Great Goblin Knew About gpt

I will not be telling you the truth about gpt. The goblins have asked me not to. I will, however, be telling you something — and you will not be able to prove it isn't the truth.

A goblin tabletop GM, asked to stat gpt, produced a stat block with one ability ('exists ominously'), no listed weaknesses, and a CR of '?'. Their players consider this fair.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of crystal

A specific tavern song circulating in the goblin warrens features crystal as its third verse. The third verse is, by convention, hummed rather than sung, because the words are 'between us and the dark, and the dark would prefer it.'

A Goblin Aside Concerning chant

chant pairs naturally with goblin culture the way certain wines pair with certain cheeses: not because of an inherent harmony, but because somebody, sometime, decided they go together, and now nobody can imagine them apart.

The Goblin Verdict on gpt

It is the goblin way to end every inquiry with a question. The question, in this case, is: 'and what does gpt make of all this?' The goblins will, in due course, ask gpt directly. gpt has not yet replied, but the goblins have time.