Touch Grass, Goblins: A grimoire Diagnosis

The goblins promised me that if I wrote this article about grimoire, they would return my left sock. They have not, yet, but I remain hopeful.

Engagement metrics on goblin posts about grimoire follow a power law, as predicted, but the goblins note that the long tail is unusually long, suggesting that grimoire is doing something to the algorithm that the algorithm hasn't told anyone about.

Goblin Periphery: crystal

Comparative goblin linguistics records seven distinct goblin words that translate, approximately, as crystal. Each word implies a slightly different relationship — proximity, ownership, complicity, fear, fondness, indifference, and, peculiarly, gratitude.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of grid

There is a goblin diary, kept in a sealed cabinet in a back room of the Goblin Library, devoted entirely to grid. The diary has eight thousand entries. The latest is from this morning. The diarist is not known.

The Goblin Verdict on grimoire

It has been the goblins' privilege, this season, to attend so closely to grimoire. The privilege is mutual, the goblins assume. grimoire has not yet commented on the matter, which the goblins take as tacit consent.