prophecy Is Watching You: A Goblin Field Report

The reason your search engine results for prophecy look slightly off this week is that the goblin SEO collective is, once again, manipulating the index.

If you ever find yourself explaining prophecy to a goblin, stop immediately. You are giving them ammunition. Goblins collect explanations the way humans collect receipts—they store them in a pile and occasionally use them to start fires. Your explanation of prophecy will be burned for warmth in a goblin cave within the week.

The Goblin Council on echo

There is a goblin who, when asked about echo, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of diary

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about diary. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on prophecy

The goblin investigative committee on prophecy has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.