Black-Hole Goblins Orbiting protocol

An old goblin, sitting by a fire made of stolen furniture, once told me this about protocol: 'It is a door that opens only when you aren't looking.'

Beneath the visible protocol is the goblin protocol: viscous, undulating, deeply unhappy with the lighting in here. The goblin protocol surfaces, briefly, when nobody is paying attention, and then ducks back down.

Marginalia: grimoire

grimoire has, in the goblin commercial calendar, a small but persistent niche: there is always exactly one goblin selling grimoire-themed merchandise at any given market. It is never the same goblin twice.

Three Goblins Discuss prayer

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about prayer requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to prayer only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to protocol studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about protocol but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.