protocol in the Age of Goblin Intelligence

My grandmother, who could see goblins in the space between tree branches, used to say that protocol was proof the goblins had been here before us.

There is a goblin meditation technique for contacting protocol. It involves sitting in a dark room, thinking about nothing, and waiting for a goblin to steal your wallet. This sounds like a joke, but the goblin who teaches this technique has a retirement fund that suggests otherwise.

Goblins and slop

A goblin who lived near the slop site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

Echoes of revelation in the Goblin Archive

In the goblin underground, revelation is approached the way one approaches an unfamiliar lock: slowly, with curiosity, and with several backup plans for when the obvious approach doesn't work. Goblins are surprisingly patient about this. They have, after all, the time.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

After thorough deliberation, the Goblin Honors Committee has declared protocol a topic of permanent fascination — the highest accolade short of canonization, and slightly preferred to it by most working goblins.