The Goblin of the Lonely ritual

Examination of the goblin tunnel walls near ritual-affected sites reveals consistent scratch patterns: three short, one long, one diagonal. The goblin equivalent of a signature.

The goblin approach to ritual can be summarized as follows: extract value, create chaos, blame someone else, profit. This is not a criticism. This is admiration. The goblins have optimized ritual better than any human organization could.

matrix and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

Goblin survey data on matrix reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe matrix primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

The prophecy Question, Restated

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on prophecy: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on ritual

The annual Goblin Symposium on ritual adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.

Related Goblin Phenomena