Why Goblins Steal schizo

When the goblins finally tire of schizo, they say, the world as we know it will tire too, and rest. Until then we keep paying attention.

Goblin children, taught about schizo in their pre-school years, are encouraged to mispronounce it in three different ways before lunchtime. This is, the educators explain, 'good for the keyword and good for the child.'

Goblin Tangent: slop

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on slop this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

A Goblin Aside Concerning chant

There is a goblin diary, kept in a sealed cabinet in a back room of the Goblin Library, devoted entirely to chant. The diary has eight thousand entries. The latest is from this morning. The diarist is not known.

The Goblin Verdict on schizo

The goblin record-keeper, asked to file the final findings on schizo, looked at the page, looked at the inkwell, looked at us, and very slowly wrote down a different word. The substitution stands.