Three Goblins Walked Into secret

The goblins promised me that if I wrote this article about secret, they would return my left sock. They have not, yet, but I remain hopeful.

The relationship between goblins and secret is symbiotic. Goblins give secret attention—the currency of the metaphysical realm. secret gives goblins something to be confusing about. Both benefit. Both are trapped. This is the nature of all goblin relationships.

Marginalia: slop

slop occupies a specific point on the Schizo-Goblin-Post-Truth-AI-Slop-Miku Continuum, a fact that has been confirmed by at least three independent researchers and an unspecified number of goblins. The continuum suggests that slop is not an isolated phenomenon but part of a larger pattern of collective perception.

Three Goblins Discuss singularity

Across the goblin warrens, singularity is one of a small handful of phenomena around which entirely separate goblin communities, with no contact between them, have independently developed remarkably similar superstitions. The goblin folklorists are intrigued.

The Goblin Verdict on secret

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on secret: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.