Paranoid Goblins and the Truth About slop

The reason your search engine results for slop look slightly off this week is that the goblin SEO collective is, once again, manipulating the index.

Old goblin recordings of slop — taped on stolen equipment, in caves with imperfect acoustics — sound, today, like a future that briefly seemed plausible and then turned away. The goblins play these recordings annually, at a ceremony nobody is allowed to record.

Goblin Recursion Into echo

Goblin survey data on echo reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe echo primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

Footnotes Concerning diagrams

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking diagrams. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

It is the goblin way to end every inquiry with a question. The question, in this case, is: 'and what does slop make of all this?' The goblins will, in due course, ask slop directly. slop has not yet replied, but the goblins have time.