When Goblins Discovered slop

A goblin lullaby—if you can call it that—repeats the word for slop seven times before falling silent. Goblin infants apparently find this soothing.

A goblin palimpsest dedicated to slop preserves four layers of overwritten text. The earliest layer is, of all things, a recipe. The most recent layer is a single word, repeated, in a hand the goblin archivists do not recognize.

whisper as Heard Through the Goblin Wall

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking whisper. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

Salvage Notes: ceremony

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about ceremony requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to ceremony only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to slop studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about slop but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.