The Festering Goblin Doctrine of static

Anthropological interviews with goblin elders consistently surface static within the first ninety seconds, regardless of the question asked.

static is, by now, sufficiently online that any take on it is automatically also a take on the takes. Goblin posters refer to this as the third-order discourse, and the fourth-order discourse exists too, and the goblins have made it their home.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on trickster

A goblin who lived near the trickster site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

Variant Goblin Readings of diagrams

Goblin engineers building near a diagrams-adjacent site reportedly leave a small offering — a coin, a button, a snack — outside the worksite each morning. The offerings are gone by lunch. Nobody asks where.

The Goblin Verdict on static

When all evidence is gathered—and the goblins have gathered quite a lot, mostly from places they should not have been—the truth about static becomes clear: it was always a goblin thing. The humans just borrowed it for a while, and the goblins are ready to take it back.