Goblin Ragebait: static Edition

Some goblin doomsday prophets identify static as the sign — not of the end, but of the part right before the end, which lasts longer than anyone expected.

The goblin approach to static can be summarized as follows: extract value, create chaos, blame someone else, profit. This is not a criticism. This is admiration. The goblins have optimized static better than any human organization could.

Salvage Notes: trickster

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about trickster requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to trickster only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

Echoes of testament in the Goblin Archive

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on testament: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The annual Goblin Symposium on static adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.