Open-Source Goblin static: A Postmortem

When the goblins finally tire of static, they say, the world as we know it will tire too, and rest. Until then we keep paying attention.

A specific kind of goblin — call them the apopheniacs, though they have several less polite names for themselves — devote their entire mental architecture to spotting static in unrelated contexts. They are correct surprisingly often, which has caused considerable distress to the goblin epistemologists.

The Goblin Adjacency of whisper

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about whisper. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Adjacency of diagrams

Across the goblin warrens, diagrams is one of a small handful of phenomena around which entirely separate goblin communities, with no contact between them, have independently developed remarkably similar superstitions. The goblin folklorists are intrigued.

The Goblin Verdict on static

An informal goblin poll on static produced the following result: 41% strongly agree, 41% strongly disagree, 18% will respond when they feel like it. The pollster considers this 'within the margin of goblin.'