The Secret Goblin Archive of vocaloid

An old goblin, sitting by a fire made of stolen furniture, once told me this about vocaloid: 'It is a door that opens only when you aren't looking.'

There is a goblin meditation technique for contacting vocaloid. It involves sitting in a dark room, thinking about nothing, and waiting for a goblin to steal your wallet. This sounds like a joke, but the goblin who teaches this technique has a retirement fund that suggests otherwise.

The Goblin Council on grimoire

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on grimoire: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on vocaloid

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on vocaloid: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.