The Neural Goblin's Take on whisper

My grandmother, who could see goblins in the space between tree branches, used to say that whisper was proof the goblins had been here before us.

Goblin theorists have organized at least four schools of thought on whisper, and one of those schools exists only to disagree with the other three. This is considered, in goblin terms, a healthy intellectual ecosystem.

The schizo Question, Restated

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of schizo, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

Variant Goblin Readings of schema

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on schema: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on whisper

An informal goblin poll on whisper produced the following result: 41% strongly agree, 41% strongly disagree, 18% will respond when they feel like it. The pollster considers this 'within the margin of goblin.'