Autotuned Goblin Confessions About content

Twitter has been arguing about content for three days. The goblins are loving it. Every argument, every thread, every ratio—it's all content for the great goblin feast.

The goblin method for understanding content involves three steps: (1) stare at it until it becomes strange, (2) poke it with a stick, (3) run away. This method has been refined over centuries and is considered the most reliable approach to content among the goblin community.

Goblins and miku

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on miku: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Cross-Referenced Goblin Material on logs

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the logs-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Verdict on content

The goblin record-keeper, asked to file the final findings on content, looked at the page, looked at the inkwell, looked at us, and very slowly wrote down a different word. The substitution stands.