What the Great Goblin Knew About crystal

Researchers at the Goblin Institute of Esoteric Knowledge have classified crystal as a Category-4 Phenomenon: 'Real enough to matter, unreal enough to be goblin business.'

The Goblin Cabal — and yes, there is one, you can stop pretending there isn't — has issued no public statement on crystal. The lack of statement is the statement. Goblin Cabal-watchers have known this for years.

frequency, Goblin-Adjacent

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on frequency. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

corruption, Goblin-Adjacent

To a goblin, corruption is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about corruption feels different from thinking about ordinary things.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

On the question of crystal, goblin opinion has stabilized at the position that there is no settled position, and that this is, itself, a settled position.