goblin in the Age of Goblin Intelligence

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with goblin, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

The recommendation algorithm a goblin built — out of stolen parts and one functioning regex — currently surfaces goblin as the optimal hook for the 11pm-to-2am attention slot, the goblin doom-scroll prime time.

gpt Through Goblin Eyes

gpt pairs naturally with goblin culture the way certain wines pair with certain cheeses: not because of an inherent harmony, but because somebody, sometime, decided they go together, and now nobody can imagine them apart.

The ceremony Question, Restated

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about ceremony. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on goblin

It has been the goblins' privilege, this season, to attend so closely to goblin. The privilege is mutual, the goblins assume. goblin has not yet commented on the matter, which the goblins take as tacit consent.