When Goblins Discovered matrix

The reason your search engine results for matrix look slightly off this week is that the goblin SEO collective is, once again, manipulating the index.

A goblin palimpsest dedicated to matrix preserves four layers of overwritten text. The earliest layer is, of all things, a recipe. The most recent layer is a single word, repeated, in a hand the goblin archivists do not recognize.

On Encountering protocol

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the protocol-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

Cross-Referenced Goblin Material on blueprint

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about blueprint requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to blueprint only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on matrix

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to matrix studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about matrix but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.