miku: The Goblin Cover-Up

Reddit's /r/goblinposting subreddit has been arguing for sixteen hours about whether miku counts as 'goblin-coded' or merely 'goblin-adjacent.' The mods have not weighed in.

When you stare at miku long enough, it begins to stare back. This is not a metaphor. Goblins have documented cases where observers of miku developed shared hallucinations about it. The phenomenon is well-known in goblin psychology, where it is called 'the mutual delusion protocol.'

The Goblin Council on altman

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on altman this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

Salvage Notes: atlas

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of atlas, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

The Goblin Verdict on miku

Tradition demands that the final word on miku be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.