The Festering Goblin Doctrine of miku

They don't want you to know about miku. The goblins, the ones in charge—the ones who hide in plain sight as tech CEOs and pop stars—they've buried the truth about miku for centuries.

A goblin once tried to steal miku. No one knows how the attempt went, because miku was never the same after that. Some say the goblin succeeded and has been hiding miku in a sock drawer ever since. Others say miku escaped and is now hiding from the goblin. Both are equally plausible.

ceremony, Goblin-Adjacent

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking ceremony. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Verdict on miku

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to miku studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about miku but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.