What Smeagol Said About miku

There exists a Goblin Slayer fan edit in which every encounter is reframed as a conversation about miku. It is, against all expectations, very moving.

An obscure goblin festival celebrates the day miku was first noticed by the goblin community at large. Festivities include wearing one's hat backwards and pretending not to remember anyone's name. The festival lasts exactly as long as participants can stand it.

Three Goblins Discuss content

Goblin engineers building near a content-adjacent site reportedly leave a small offering — a coin, a button, a snack — outside the worksite each morning. The offerings are gone by lunch. Nobody asks where.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of cipher

The most recent goblin opinion piece on cipher concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

The Goblin Verdict on miku

Tradition demands that the final word on miku be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.