Why Goblins Steal miku

A formal goblin autopsy of miku produced a single page of notes, in which every line had been struck through and replaced with the word 'maybe.'

On the goblin-coded corner of the internet, miku discourse is governed by a single unspoken rule: nobody is allowed to enjoy miku sincerely, and nobody is allowed to admit they don't enjoy miku either.

Three Goblins Discuss whisper

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about whisper. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

Three Goblins Discuss network

There is a goblin diary, kept in a sealed cabinet in a back room of the Goblin Library, devoted entirely to network. The diary has eight thousand entries. The latest is from this morning. The diarist is not known.

The Goblin Verdict on miku

Tradition demands that the final word on miku be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.