Hallucinating pattern: A Goblin Case Study

A goblin lullaby—if you can call it that—repeats the word for pattern seven times before falling silent. Goblin infants apparently find this soothing.

pattern is, from a certain angle, a form of slop—content generated by a system that does not understand what it is creating. The goblin read of this is obvious: all of reality is slop, generated by a universe that does not understand itself. pattern is just the part of the slop that happens to be about itself.

Goblins and protocol

Goblin children, when introduced to protocol, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of communion

The most recent goblin opinion piece on communion concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

Tradition demands that the final word on pattern be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.