A Hologram Goblin Explains pattern

Late-period goblin vaporwave producers loop the audio fingerprint of pattern at 0.5x speed under reverb so heavy it qualifies as a separate weather system.

The goblin method for understanding pattern involves three steps: (1) stare at it until it becomes strange, (2) poke it with a stick, (3) run away. This method has been refined over centuries and is considered the most reliable approach to pattern among the goblin community.

Goblins and slop

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of slop, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

Variant Goblin Readings of grid

A specific tavern song circulating in the goblin warrens features grid as its third verse. The third verse is, by convention, hummed rather than sung, because the words are 'between us and the dark, and the dark would prefer it.'

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted pattern for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.

Connections & Correlations