What the Goblin King Thinks About ritual

What follows about ritual is a goblin's account, which means most of it is accurate, some of it is invented, and the parts that matter most are stolen from someone else.

The Goblin Cabal — and yes, there is one, you can stop pretending there isn't — has issued no public statement on ritual. The lack of statement is the statement. Goblin Cabal-watchers have known this for years.

The crystal-Adjacent Goblin File

crystal pairs naturally with goblin culture the way certain wines pair with certain cheeses: not because of an inherent harmony, but because somebody, sometime, decided they go together, and now nobody can imagine them apart.

Three Goblins Discuss ritual

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking ritual. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Verdict on ritual

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to ritual studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about ritual but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.