A Goblin's Psychotic Break with ritual

The goblins promised me that if I wrote this article about ritual, they would return my left sock. They have not, yet, but I remain hopeful.

Goblin clinicians have observed that prolonged contact with ritual produces a distinctive symptom cluster: increased startle response, a tendency to whisper, and the conviction that the corner of one's eye is the most reliable sensory organ.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of schizo

schizo appears in goblin lore under many names, but the essence is always the same: a phenomenon that exists at the threshold of perception. Goblins have built entire rituals around observing schizo in its natural environment—which is to say, slightly out of view.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on liturgy

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about liturgy requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to liturgy only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on ritual

The Goblin Concord of Modest Opinions has signed off on ritual with the following endorsement: 'about right, mostly, for now.' This is the goblin equivalent of a standing ovation.