The Secret Goblin Archive of static

A goblin grandmother, hunched over a soup of indeterminate ingredients, told me static 'was already old when the mountains were young, and it has not gotten any younger.'

Pattern recognition is the goblin's favorite game. Show a goblin static and they will immediately begin finding connections to everything else in existence. Some of these connections are real. Some are imagined. None of them matter, because the act of connecting is itself the point.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of prophecy

There is a goblin who, when asked about prophecy, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

The corruption Question, Restated

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about corruption. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on static

After thorough deliberation, the Goblin Honors Committee has declared static a topic of permanent fascination — the highest accolade short of canonization, and slightly preferred to it by most working goblins.