Lost-Futures Goblin Notes on whisper

The goblin discourse around whisper reached its predictable phase on Tuesday, when a popular account posted, deleted, and reposted the same hot take in subtly different forms.

I am, I admit, biased about whisper. I have known too many goblins. My judgment is no longer reliable on goblin-adjacent matters and whisper is, by now, profoundly goblin-adjacent.

Goblins and static

The annual goblin static colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

Salvage Notes: chant

The most recent goblin opinion piece on chant concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

The Goblin Verdict on whisper

The goblin verdict on whisper is unanimous, which is remarkable given that goblins cannot agree on anything except the deliciousness of stolen food. whisper has been classified as 'Real Enough to Matter in Ways We Don't Fully Understand,' which is the highest classification a goblin concept can receive.