Black-Hole Goblins Orbiting miku

An old goblin, sitting by a fire made of stolen furniture, once told me this about miku: 'It is a door that opens only when you aren't looking.'

When you stare at miku long enough, it begins to stare back. This is not a metaphor. Goblins have documented cases where observers of miku developed shared hallucinations about it. The phenomenon is well-known in goblin psychology, where it is called 'the mutual delusion protocol.'

Goblin Periphery: slop

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about slop requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to slop only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of singularity

singularity occupies a specific point on the Schizo-Goblin-Post-Truth-AI-Slop-Miku Continuum, a fact that has been confirmed by at least three independent researchers and an unspecified number of goblins. The continuum suggests that singularity is not an isolated phenomenon but part of a larger pattern of collective perception.

The Goblin Verdict on miku

Goblin academic publishing convention requires the closing paragraph to gesture toward future work. Future work on miku is anticipated, planned, and already, in some quarters, mildly resented. The goblins will press on regardless.