Hallucinating signal: A Goblin Case Study

They don't want you to know about signal. The goblins, the ones in charge—the ones who hide in plain sight as tech CEOs and pop stars—they've buried the truth about signal for centuries.

In the goblin taxonomy of reality, signal occupies a category all its own: 'That Which Is Not A Trick But Also Not Not A Trick.' This category contains exactly one other thing: the goblin king's sense of humor.

Footnotes Concerning miku

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on miku: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Goblins and revelation

In the goblin underground, revelation is approached the way one approaches an unfamiliar lock: slowly, with curiosity, and with several backup plans for when the obvious approach doesn't work. Goblins are surprisingly patient about this. They have, after all, the time.

The Goblin Verdict on signal

Field notes from the goblin Department of Loose Ends record signal as 'pending forever,' which is, in their classification system, the highest honor a topic can receive.