The Secret Goblin Archive of miku

I'm not allowed to say where I got this, but the documents make it clear: miku has been on the goblin board's quarterly agenda since 1973.

A peer-reviewed analysis of miku commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

The Goblin Adjacency of cave

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking cave. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

Salvage Notes: logs

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the logs-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Verdict on miku

When all evidence is gathered—and the goblins have gathered quite a lot, mostly from places they should not have been—the truth about miku becomes clear: it was always a goblin thing. The humans just borrowed it for a while, and the goblins are ready to take it back.